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Best Gifts for A Neurodivergent Child

Whether you’ve recently received a diagnosis of neurodivergence in your own family or you’re preparing for birthday party season (which is, of course, every season when you have kids), finding the right gifts for neurodiverse children can be tricky… but well worth the effort. When you’re buying for a neurodiverse child, a gift has the potential to mean more than a gift. A fidget spinner might calm anxiety when all else fails; a remote-control model may unlock a social interaction. Even something as simple as silicone beads that a baby with autism can use to develop biting and chewing skills could be a game-changer.

Photography: Gravity blanket

Written By: Jenna Gabrial Gallagher

In simplest terms, neurodiversity refers to brains that learn and process information differently than neurotypical brains do. It encompasses spectrums within spectrums of varying abilities, needs, patterns and behaviors. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, about one in six U.S. children aged 3-17 are diagnosed with conditions that fall under the neurodiversity umbrella, including autism, ADHD and some learning disabilities.

With the right support and resources, many people with neurodiversity thrive because of their creative, out-of-the-box thinking. In fact, Harvard Business Review says neurodivergence can be a competitive advantage in the workplace, and cites companies like Microsoft that have incorporated it into their DEI efforts.

Still, giving kids the tools they need to succeed requires fact-finding. Does the child react to sensory stimuli? Do they pick up on nonverbal social cues? What are some effective ways they relieve anxiety? Once you know what works (and what absolutely does not), it’s easy to narrow down which types of gifts are right for a neurodiverse child on your shopping list.

Gifts to Stimulate the Senses

Activities that stimulate the senses create new neural pathways and improve the way neurodiverse children process things they experience through their senses. They can help calm anxiety, ease unfamiliar situations, quiet repetitive behaviors and fire up creativity. Plus, there are sensory toys and activities for every age group, brain type, and ability level—which makes them a go-to gift idea for children with autism. Some of our favorites include:

For Babies:

Sensory mats

Silicone chewing beads and teethers

Sensory balls

Soft books with different textures on each page

Clothing, blankets and soft toys with tags that make a crinkling sound

For toddlers and older:

Headphones or a portable audio player that they can work themselves

Cut-out numbers and letters that allow the child to feel the different shapes

Shakers, bean bags and rain sticks that produce a relaxing sound

Modeling clay or putty

Flash cards with bold, clean graphics

For school-age kids and older:

Kinetic sand or a sand and water table

Fidget toys and stress balls

Silicone pop toys

Scented markers or crayons

Tactile soothers like sequin flip designs

young girl with sensory bead necklace and bracelet

Gifts to Promote Social and Emotional Learning

For many neurodiverse children—particularly those on the autism spectrum—social interactions can be a challenge. They may be shy or intimidated, or they may really want to engage with others but are perceived negatively due to an inability to pick up on social cues. Here are some gifts for children with autism to make their interactions more comfortable:

Cause and effect toys help teach children that they can control their own environment. This category includes any type of interactive toy that responds to a child’s voice or touch with light sound, and/or vibrations, as well as toys that have features to push, pull or spin.

Books and toys that highlight different emotions can help children get acquainted with “reading the room.”

Kids can learn to share and wait for their turn with ability-appropriate card games and board games, or by taking turns with musical instrument toys or block towers.

All children practice social interactions by role playing with dolls, stuffed animals, puppets, action figures and/or robots, but for neurodiverse children these activities can offer invaluable experience. Many parents also report that digital assistance devices (like Alexa) are great for kids who love to talk and ask lots of questions.

girl hugging several dolls - best gift for neurodivergent child

Gifts for Fine Motor Skills and Spatial Relationships

Some neurodiverse kids excel at building, intricate handiwork, and understanding how things fit together, while for others, buttoning a coat can be a daily struggle. Whatever the case, you can help them work on their dexterity and space perception with gifts like:

Lacing beads and shapes

Tangrams and magnetic tiles

Legos and blocks

Puzzles

String art and embroidery

playing with tangrams for learning spacial relationships

Wearable Gifts

Looking good and feeling good usually go hand-in-hand, but for kids with sensory issues, a scratchy tag or seams in a sock can wreck the vibe of the entire day. Fortunately, there are plenty of cute, seamless, tagless clothing options in soft, comfortable materials for kids. Additional wearable gifts for children with autism or other sensory issues include:

Clothes and shoes that are easy to get on and off without buttons, zippers, ties or buckles

Fingerless gloves to help protect against tactile sensitivity and keep hands cozy, while freeing the fingers to make playing and other activities easier

Hoodies to help prevent stimulus overload

Earmuffs to buffer irritating noises

Gifts for Sweet Dreams

A 2019 study found that 80% of preschoolers with autism also have disrupted sleep. This can make the challenging task of navigating the neurotypical world even more difficult. Here are some things you can give neurodiverse children to help avoid sleep deficits:

Weighted blanket or sleep bag to provide comfort and relieve stress

A weighted stuffed animal that can be part of the bedtime routine

A white noise machine—it might not be the best gift for every child with autism, but for some it works every time

Night lights that project a gentle, familiar pattern and provide a sense of security

Finally, since in the world of neurodivergence, consistency is key, when you find the gifts that work best for the neurodiverse child in your world, it might be a good idea to make sure you get a few backups for when they are misplaced, outgrown or loved too much.

boy holding a night light a good gift for a neurodiverse child

Jenna Gabrial Gallagher is a writer and editor who specializes in topics related to lifestyle and design, families, women entrepreneurs, travel and sustainability. She has three funny little girls.

photo credits: January Moon Cobalt Sensory Bracelet; Mon Ami Cookie Scented Doll; Lowercase Toys Mini Tangrams; Cabbages & Kings Fingerless Gloves shot by @jojessicapaterson for @maisonetteworld in Barra Scotland with model @alannalilymacneil; LumiPets Puppy Nightlight.